Sometimes it's hard to come by that feeling of peace

Things are generally good.
There's so many exciting new things happening how could they not be.
I'm going in to meet the photographer at work this week. I'm free from negativity....at the moment. I'm generally excited about school and my photo project coming up. I'm busy so my thoughts can't linger from what I have to get done.

I'm concerned about someone though. That they are never gonna be able to be their full self. That one day they will wake up and realize this life they've always had planned doesn't make them happy. I cannot tell this person what to do because it is not my decision to make but I hope in time they are able to change their perspective on this slightly and realize if this is what they truly want. I know that me along with many others only want the best for them.

I have this complex about me. If I find out that someone was bothered enough to tell someone else about something I've said to them or done...it bothers me to no end. It means whatever I did irritated them enough to repeat it...it's still fresh in their mind or playing over and over. Come to me if I'm bothering you people I don't do these things intentionally.

As for you. I know you say you don't read this anymore so that gives me the more reason to write things. I still care about you a lot and hope that we can remain friends. But this is gonna take me a bit to find out how to be your friend. I haven't allowed myself to really think about this till I found myself snapping at people and they attributed it to this situation. I'm alright until I let myself think about it too much. And lord knows it will be difficult once we are in the same room again but I'm not thinking about that now. I have too much to do.

But for now it's just time for breakfast.