This is the Forcast

We all do things we regret. I regret some of the choices I've made but I wouldn't go back and change anything if I could. These mistakes are the things that make us grow and learn that maybe next time when a similar situation arises....we should try things differently.
I feel like I'm stuck. Stuck in a rut. Stuck in a monotonous way of life. Stuck with no words. I can't continue to live like this. For some of you reading this it might sound weird knowing that I can be really shy upon meeting new people....but I'm not always. The thing is I get restless. I don't like living the same day twice. I need to learn new things and I thought my classes would help in this...since I took them to fulfill interests I have. But it's not working I need more. I need to go places and do new things. I come from a small town with a city a boat ride away. I took advantage of that secluded area and focused inward and I regret that.....maybe that is something I would change. I wish I had gone to that city more and explored....because now I wish that city was a ferry boat away and I could explore. The good thing is Steph and Stacey like to explore too. Steph and Jack went to goggleworks yesterday in Reading...it sounds cool I wanna go. We tried to go to the crayola factory but the times didn't like us. Tonight I'm going to watch Jack's little brother Matt play basketball for Alvernia. I'm super excited. I like basketball. My schedule is full today and I like it that way but the one person I need to sort more things out with is not involved in these plans and for that I'm a little bit irritated.
I don't need to feel like I'm 2 inches tall anymore. I can't and I won't.

Subtle like a Mack truck

Thanks to my mother I've inherited this lovely trait of being 'subtle like a mack truck' as my dad likes to call it. Although it takes time for me to be this way with people...usually. I think it's a good quality to have though because you are true to yourself and ultimately that's the most important thing. Take me or leave me.
Payonk and I finally made it to the gym after weeks of talking about it. It's always better when you get there even if you forget your id card and eventually have to pretend your name is Stacey Strayer for awhile. We are going tomorrow....so proud of us. That reminds me that I miss playing soccer more than anything else from my past....besides living on the west coast.
Speaking of that glorious coast....things are starting to fall into place for my summer out there and I can't wait I wish I was there RIGHT NOW. I need it...I have a lot to get through until then...approx. 9 weeks of classes and a week of finals. I'm steadily busy and I like that. I want more out of life than this little town gives me....starting to get restless.
Here's a couple pics of the big snow storm from around campus.

So there's this guy I like to call Dad

Home for the long weekend with my two dogs and my dad.
Everyone went home and I said there's no place I'd rather be.
After a failure of a movie yesterday and all day studying today, my good old pops made me dinner. Salmon....mmmmm and I made the salad. We sat at the cute little table in our kitchen and chatted about life and religion and how the hell our world got to this state of anger and hatred. If I find myself a guy like my dad I would be so lucky. He's just such a well rounded good guy and I'm incredibly lucky to have him as a father for I feel he has made me a good person too (not to say my mom didn't help with that too). I always talk about him to my friends as my little fashion bug father who likes shopping more than I do :) but he's more than that. I think one of the most annoying thing about men is their ego and while it's practically impossible to overcome that my dad is an incredibly humble person who realizes he's like everyone else in that he has faults as well. I love you dad even with your crazy hair and bandannas!
<3

Happy Valentine's Day

It's 10am.
I've been up for an hour.
...partially because of the rain/hail that has been hitting my window all night and partially because I went to be at 12 and took an almost 3 hour nap yesterday so I guess I'm not tired anymore.

The good news is that it is Valentine's Day and classes are cancelled because of the previous mentioned 'shitty' weather...not really sure why I decided that need quotes.

On the more depressing side of things this weather is forcing my mom to delay her trip to California until tomorrow. Keep her in your thoughts that everything goes smoothly tomorrow because her heart is in San Diego along with her family and my sister as of today.

Not really sure what I'm up to today. I was planning on getting up early and finishing my reading and a couple things I had to write but now that I don't have to finish these things by today it seems a waste. Wednesdays are my least favorite day too but today it's a whole lot better. Oh yeah and LOST is on tonight!

Love the one you're with!

<3

Linus you gave me a necklace similar to this right before we left the west.

I didn't wear it for all that long and I know you didn't either. But lately I've been missing you and I found the necklace in my room and it hasn't come off since. I carry you heart.

I carry you're heart with me (I carry it in my heart)
I am never without it (anywhere I go you go, my dear, and whatever is done my only me is your doing, my darling)
I fear no fate (For beautiful you are my world, my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatver a sun will always sing is you

Here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud and the sky of the sky of a tree called life, which grows higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wondere that's keeping the stars apart

I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)

EE Cummings


Love you sissy!

So theraputic I needed to do it twice

It's been one of those days. Nothing goes quite right. Little things tick away at me and bring me down. It was so cold I would consider living in a sauna. I think I need a new camera. A manual for 10 bucks would be nice. Working on that this weekend. Crayola Factory Fri. (hopefully).
I don't know what I'd do without

This girl. Syd is one of my friends from high school. We were never that close but over the summer when I first moved east we talked through emails A LOT. She stayed home from college her first year and moved back to Sacramento with her dad due to health. Now she's doing wonderfully and she moved to NYC for acting school and lives in Brooklyn. I can't even wait till it gets warmer so I can go visit her. She always puts a smile on my face like almost no one else can do! Too bad she doesn't read this but if she did I say thank you for getting me through some tough times!

Julian Beever's 3D Sidewalk Art

Check it out!
Click above to see other cool illusions!

Have a spectacular day!

Here's to those that aren't always on our minds

Always looking for a cause to support Stacey and I read this article in Rolling Stone about the terrible things that are happening in Tibet as I type this.


We then looked for some way to contribute to the Tibetan freedom from the oppressive Chinese. What we found was this website dedicated to students looking to support Tibetans.
We bought these
it's a bracelet made by a Tibetan nun to raise awareness. The short blurb it comes with includes the something to the effect of....Today it is worn as an expression of endurance and defiance against the Chinese government. I always wish I could do more for things like these but at least these people are in my thoughts. Hopefully their fight to maintain there culture results in peace and an even stronger Tibet.

These girls are on my mind a lot recently.

The one on the left is of course my sister and the one on the right is Gretchen, one of my sister's friends. She was around our house a lot in the last couple years I was in high school and was always so sweet and smiling. She's struggling with her health and I hope she knows she's in my thoughts and I know she can overcome this because she has already overcome SO much.
I love you both if you are reading this!
Until we meet again memories are all we have.

I miss getting comments from people.....so leave some about things or people on your mind or whatever you feel.

<3To all those I miss<3